Dating Advice Thread

[Purple Santa]

Originally Posted by Vanthar

I once got a solid 6 months of amazing sex/blowjobs from a crazy chick with no real relationship to speak of. All I had to do was move to a new place after it ended!


Worth it.

But Diabloboy is not that smooth. Hence the advice. And seeing how he handled it...it is very true...he's not that smooth.

Originally Posted by Superman's Dead

Some people gotta get slapped.

Someone is doing it wrong then in your case. Or not enough. Krispy needs to stop breaking hearts and start slapping you more.

Originally Posted by Hawkzombie

And Purple Santa...I liked your diagnosis so much it became my headliner signature quote

I pass my test for my license AND I get sigged from HZ. What a weekend!

[civil_dead]

diablo, please tell me that wasn't verbatim what you said. If so, I think we may have discovered one of the causes for your romantic troubles. Remember, you are a man with a dick swinging between your legs that this woman wanted to explore. Act as such, even in these types of situations. I imagine SD slapping you after he's done with the others.

That's something I would say to a homeless guy on the subway. Hell, even then I'd throw in a "sweet tits" and rub his arm in a show of gratitude. Because I'm a man.


--
Sent from a phone so please forgive any grammatical, spelling or factual errors.

[Hawkzombie]

That looks like David the Gnome and the Scout from TF2 had a bastard child.

[Shjinta]

More like Santa during the "Off" Season..

[bstiff]

Originally Posted by Ink Asylum

How many times does it have to be said: Don't Stick Your Dick In Crazy.

Although, it's permissible if she's hot enough.



Just don't cross that Vicky Mendoza Diagonal.

In my experience that line has a much steeper angle.

[J Arcane]

Goddamnit, I do not need to be attracted to anyone right now.

[J Arcane]

She's so cute though.

And of course, in my drug-induced precociousness, when I saw she still didn't have a partner in my acting class, just sitting all alone up in a back row, I just had to go over and ask if she wanted to be scene partners.

Which means now, I've got like, 2-3 weeks minimum before I can actually ask her out because otherwise it'll be all awkward and shit, and for all I know I've blown my shot already anyway after showing up in sweatpants the first day of class, and coming to school all antiperspirantless today, and then inadvertantly picking two different sexually charged scenes to recommend before the one we decided on (in which instead, her character is leaving mine ...)

Argh. I'm a lonely, sad son-of-a-bitch.

[Superman's Dead]

I believe the greatest dating advice I can give is this: always wear antiperspirant.

[J Arcane]

Originally Posted by Superman's Dead

I believe the greatest dating advice I can give is this: always wear antiperspirant.

Technically I was, or at least, I tried to. You know when you get down to that last bit of bar that doesn't quite get over the edge of the plastic around it? That's what I've had to work with all this week, because I was too broke to pick up a fresh stick.

[torrefaction]

Everyone should go back and read like...pages 15-25 of this thread. I just spent like an hour laughing my ass off.

[Ox]

Originally Posted by torrefaction

Everyone should go back and read like...pages 15-25 of this thread. I just spent like an hour laughing my ass off.

Really? Hmm...

Originally Posted by Hawkzombie

Skimming through this...I can only thank GOD I'm married. I was terrible at dating before, and I'm sure time has not fixed that.

And I lost forever.

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Hawkzombie

That looks like David the Gnome and the Scout from TF2 had a bastard child.

Or BigJonno.

[Purple Santa]

@J Arcane: You are thinking to much. Meditate or something...just find a way to relax. It's a female. They aren't unicorns. If you mess up with this one it doesn't mean you destroy the species if you accidentally hurt it

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Purple Santa

@J Arcane: You are thinking to much. Meditate or something...just find a way to relax. It's a female. They aren't unicorns. If you mess up with this one it doesn't mean you destroy the species if you accidentally hurt it

I can read and chant this too myself for ages. Wouldn't make anything easier.

[J Arcane]

Isn't there supposed to be some rule about not getting into relationships within X period of starting a new medication?

[Purple Santa]

Originally Posted by Xerxes

I can read and chant this too myself for ages. Wouldn't make anything easier.

I'm not as eloquent as civil when I will state the same advice he often gives: It's not about chanting the advice or even believing it. It's actually going out and doing it despite every piece of you screaming "noooooooo". Do it enough, yes meaning fail miserably at times and it does become "easier". It's not the doing really. It's the imagining of the failing. Failing in reality is a lot less painful than the failing we imagine in our heads.

After you have a drink thrown in your face or even better stiletto boot thrown at your head...really it does become less difficult (hint: you learn to duck faster )

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Purple Santa

I'm not as eloquent as civil when I will state the same advice he often gives: It's not about chanting the advice or even believing it. It's actually going out and doing it despite every piece of you screaming "noooooooo". Do it enough, yes meaning fail miserably at times and it does become "easier". It's not the doing really. It's the imagining of the failing. Failing in reality is a lot less painful than the failing we imagine in our heads.

After you have a drink thrown in your face or even better stiletto boot thrown at your head...really it does become less difficult (hint: you learn to duck faster )

I think civil just says something like nut up.

[Hawkzombie]

Just do what I did. Get married again

[muddi900]

And tattoos...

[Purple Santa]

Originally Posted by Hawkzombie

Just do what I did. Get married again

To your wife? Don't you think she should know if you are pimping her out like that? Never mind. She's on here. She'll just read it herself.