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Old 03-26-2012, 03:56 AM   #8741
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Vanthar View Post
I once got a solid 6 months of amazing sex/blowjobs from a crazy chick with no real relationship to speak of. All I had to do was move to a new place after it ended!


Worth it.
But Diabloboy is not that smooth. Hence the advice. And seeing how he handled it...it is very true...he's not that smooth.
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Some people gotta get slapped.
Someone is doing it wrong then in your case. Or not enough. Krispy needs to stop breaking hearts and start slapping you more.
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And Purple Santa...I liked your diagnosis so much it became my headliner signature quote
I pass my test for my license AND I get sigged from HZ. What a weekend!
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Old 03-26-2012, 04:26 AM   #8742
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diablo, please tell me that wasn't verbatim what you said. If so, I think we may have discovered one of the causes for your romantic troubles. Remember, you are a man with a dick swinging between your legs that this woman wanted to explore. Act as such, even in these types of situations. I imagine SD slapping you after he's done with the others.

That's something I would say to a homeless guy on the subway. Hell, even then I'd throw in a "sweet tits" and rub his arm in a show of gratitude. Because I'm a man.


--
Sent from a phone so please forgive any grammatical, spelling or factual errors.
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Old 03-26-2012, 09:23 PM   #8743
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That looks like David the Gnome and the Scout from TF2 had a bastard child.
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Old 03-27-2012, 01:46 AM   #8744
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More like Santa during the "Off" Season..
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Old 03-27-2012, 04:34 AM   #8745
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ink Asylum View Post
How many times does it have to be said: Don't Stick Your Dick In Crazy.

Although, it's permissible if she's hot enough.



Just don't cross that Vicky Mendoza Diagonal.
In my experience that line has a much steeper angle.
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Old 04-05-2012, 10:50 PM   #8746
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Goddamnit, I do not need to be attracted to anyone right now.
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Old 04-06-2012, 01:15 AM   #8747
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She's so cute though.

And of course, in my drug-induced precociousness, when I saw she still didn't have a partner in my acting class, just sitting all alone up in a back row, I just had to go over and ask if she wanted to be scene partners.

Which means now, I've got like, 2-3 weeks minimum before I can actually ask her out because otherwise it'll be all awkward and shit, and for all I know I've blown my shot already anyway after showing up in sweatpants the first day of class, and coming to school all antiperspirantless today, and then inadvertantly picking two different sexually charged scenes to recommend before the one we decided on (in which instead, her character is leaving mine ...)

Argh. I'm a lonely, sad son-of-a-bitch.
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Old 04-06-2012, 01:33 AM   #8748
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I believe the greatest dating advice I can give is this: always wear antiperspirant.
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Old 04-06-2012, 01:36 AM   #8749
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I believe the greatest dating advice I can give is this: always wear antiperspirant.
Technically I was, or at least, I tried to. You know when you get down to that last bit of bar that doesn't quite get over the edge of the plastic around it? That's what I've had to work with all this week, because I was too broke to pick up a fresh stick.
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Old 04-06-2012, 03:13 AM   #8750
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Everyone should go back and read like...pages 15-25 of this thread. I just spent like an hour laughing my ass off.
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Old 04-06-2012, 08:44 AM   #8751
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Everyone should go back and read like...pages 15-25 of this thread. I just spent like an hour laughing my ass off.
Really? Hmm...
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Skimming through this...I can only thank GOD I'm married. I was terrible at dating before, and I'm sure time has not fixed that.
And I lost forever.
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When you've got a girl tied up and she thinks you're going to do crazy Nazi experiments on her, she'll fake anything.
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Ok, so all this stuff about me being wiser, and doing better things for myself, etc....ignore that.
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Old 04-06-2012, 08:56 AM   #8752
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That looks like David the Gnome and the Scout from TF2 had a bastard child.
Or BigJonno.
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Old 04-06-2012, 03:45 PM   #8753
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@J Arcane: You are thinking to much. Meditate or something...just find a way to relax. It's a female. They aren't unicorns. If you mess up with this one it doesn't mean you destroy the species if you accidentally hurt it
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Rails? The DAY/END threads don't need no stinking rails, they just meander like a drunk looking for a bench to flop down on~ Gorvi

Hell, 'derail'? This is like calling the surface of the sun 'warmish'. Somewhat lacking in appropriate magnitude~ Jpublic

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Old 04-06-2012, 04:00 PM   #8754
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@J Arcane: You are thinking to much. Meditate or something...just find a way to relax. It's a female. They aren't unicorns. If you mess up with this one it doesn't mean you destroy the species if you accidentally hurt it
I can read and chant this too myself for ages. Wouldn't make anything easier.
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Old 04-06-2012, 04:05 PM   #8755
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Isn't there supposed to be some rule about not getting into relationships within X period of starting a new medication?
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Old 04-06-2012, 04:09 PM   #8756
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xerxes View Post
I can read and chant this too myself for ages. Wouldn't make anything easier.
I'm not as eloquent as civil when I will state the same advice he often gives: It's not about chanting the advice or even believing it. It's actually going out and doing it despite every piece of you screaming "noooooooo". Do it enough, yes meaning fail miserably at times and it does become "easier". It's not the doing really. It's the imagining of the failing. Failing in reality is a lot less painful than the failing we imagine in our heads.

After you have a drink thrown in your face or even better stiletto boot thrown at your head...really it does become less difficult (hint: you learn to duck faster )
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Rails? The DAY/END threads don't need no stinking rails, they just meander like a drunk looking for a bench to flop down on~ Gorvi

Hell, 'derail'? This is like calling the surface of the sun 'warmish'. Somewhat lacking in appropriate magnitude~ Jpublic

That's too applied for my tastes. Math makes the most sense to me when it's reality bending abstraction. Or when it's evil~ Frederec
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Old 04-06-2012, 06:13 PM   #8757
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Quote:
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I'm not as eloquent as civil when I will state the same advice he often gives: It's not about chanting the advice or even believing it. It's actually going out and doing it despite every piece of you screaming "noooooooo". Do it enough, yes meaning fail miserably at times and it does become "easier". It's not the doing really. It's the imagining of the failing. Failing in reality is a lot less painful than the failing we imagine in our heads.

After you have a drink thrown in your face or even better stiletto boot thrown at your head...really it does become less difficult (hint: you learn to duck faster )
I think civil just says something like nut up.
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Bitch, please. I've gone through the alphabet with more girls than a kindergarten teacher. -Ox
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the original Game Boy was the size of a VCR -pronounconnoun
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Old 04-07-2012, 01:28 AM   #8758
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Just do what I did. Get married again
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There is the crazy HZ and the well refined logic and reasoning HZ. Both are pretty entertaining -Purple Santa
I love that Hawk exists to make every decision I make, no matter how self-destructive, look wise by comparison. -Ox
I just realized that for the longest time I've been getting you and Karak mixed up. -fitbabits
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Old 04-07-2012, 02:26 AM   #8759
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And tattoos...
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COG Finished Games 2012, Now with 25% more epeen padding!---Thread

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I think it's the collective form of the noun, actually.
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taint = slippery slope

Got it. Thanks.
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Old 04-07-2012, 03:56 PM   #8760
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Quote:
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Just do what I did. Get married again
To your wife? Don't you think she should know if you are pimping her out like that? Never mind. She's on here. She'll just read it herself.
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Rails? The DAY/END threads don't need no stinking rails, they just meander like a drunk looking for a bench to flop down on~ Gorvi

Hell, 'derail'? This is like calling the surface of the sun 'warmish'. Somewhat lacking in appropriate magnitude~ Jpublic

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