Everyday Superpowers

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Wraith

As yet another added bonus, it has none of these problems. This isn't a monkey's paw- style wish.

YOU DON'T KNOW THAT!

Also watch your wording.

[Xerxes]

I'd be able to summon police. Like while driving and there is someone driving recklessly, I'd be able to summon like a phantom police car who'll appear right behind them with my limited assessment and time to make they're on call. I mean this one lady had to been on something one day and it was just like wow. Nobody to stop her.

Or the other night when two groups decided to have a party across the street from one another with two types of music blasting. Wouldn't be a problem except this was behind my house. And the groups weren't at a club. Fucking parking lot parties. Summon em to bust that shit up right then and there.

[Karak]

Originally Posted by Xerxes

I'd be able to summon prostitutes.

Fixed.

As for me I would love an internal perfectly working spelling and grammar checker.

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Karak

Fixed.

As for me I would love an internal perfectly working spelling and grammar checker.

Prostitutes would still want money. If I was going that route, I'd be able to summon disease free (female) sluts.

You have to say female because you'll probably keep pulling dude sluts.

[Joshkdmw]

Originally Posted by Xerxes

I'd be able to summon police.

Just move to LA, they'll have one tailing you 24/7 anyways.

[Zero]

Because he's a good citizen that needs protection?

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Joshkdmw

Just move to LA, they'll have one tailing you 24/7 anyways.

Why would I want police tailing me? I'm not the problem.

[Joshkdmw]

Originally Posted by Xerxes

Why would I want police tailing me? I'm not the problem.

So you can point them to the actual problems when they happen.

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Joshkdmw

So you can point them to the actual problems when they happen.

Yeah... no thanks.

[Handmade.Mercury]

But that would pretty much be the superpower you just said you would want, though.

[Xerxes]

Originally Posted by Handmade.Mercury

But that would pretty much be the superpower you just said you would want, though.

Following me? Never said that. Going to LA? Never said that.

Also that read like a you're black and so get racist police following you around joke. Did he say that no but that's what it sounded like. But again, not what I said.

[ShivaX]

Originally Posted by Xerxes

Following me? Never said that. Going to LA? Never said that.

Also that read like a you're black and so get racist police following you around joke. Did he say that no but that's what it sounded like. But again, not what I said.

Now I want my power to be summoning racist police.

I may accidentally use my power while on a plane. Cop cars can fly right?

[PathMaster]

Could have used that power this morning. Luckily the Mustang in front of me as he slammed on his brakes pulled right of the vehicle in front of him. Otherwise I would have smashed the shit out of the back end of his car. Again, no signalling and lack of proper braking distance from the asshats in front of us.

[Dorkandproudofit]

I would like the ability to summon Civil or Ultima to belittle people sitting next to me at the local bar repeating Limbaugh quotes as if they were the unvarnished truth.

[Joshkdmw]

Originally Posted by Xerxes

Following me? Never said that. Going to LA? Never said that.

Also that read like a you're black and so get racist police following you around joke. Did he say that no but that's what it sounded like. But again, not what I said.

Yeah, I was going for the Racist LAPD gag.

[jpc_theoneandonly]

The power to use a banhammer on people, IRL! Just imagine, instead of the power to punch stupid people and get away with it, how about wielding a mighty hammer that banishes their very existence? With one swing, POOF! It is as if they never existed. And if they had somehow procreated, they vanish too.

[evilgoodwin]

Originally Posted by jpc_theoneandonly

The power to use a banhammer on people, IRL! Just imagine, instead of the power to punch stupid people and get away with it, how about wielding a mighty hammer that banishes their very existence? With one swing, POOF! It is as if they never existed. And if they had somehow procreated, they vanish too.

Oh, there was a guy at the bar that I'm surprised didn't get kicked out. Loud, obnoxious, shit-talking, etc. Loudly insulting people indirectly (talking shit like "These California fucks don't know what real Texas is like! Fucking pricks and their condos! Get them f*****s out of our fucking state!" about the people sitting at the table behind him because they just happened to be dressed nicer than him). He actually said to a friend of mine, loudly, "You wearing fucking shorts and sandals to a fucking bar? This ain't a beach, fag! You wear sandals to a bar, you're just asking for fucking trouble." The reply? "Talking shit to a stranger and his three large friends (actual construction workers. HUGE dudes)? Sounds like YOU'RE asking for trouble."

Guy didn't get the shit kicked out of him, OR thrown out for harassing people. I need this banhammer.