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View Full Version : Man Uses Bat'leth To Rob Stores

Telefrog
02-04-2009, 08:42 AM
http://www.thedenverchannel.com/news/18637190/detail.html

A half hour later, police received a call from a 7-Eleven at 2407 N Union Blvd, where a male matching the previous description entered the store with a sword. He also demanded money from the store clerk. The clerk did not give him any money and the suspect left the store on foot.

Both clerks described the weapon as a Star Trek Klingon type sword, called a "Batleth."

If he was a real Klingon, the second store clerk would've had to give up the money.
Squidbot
02-04-2009, 08:52 AM
If he was a real Klingon, the second store clerk would've had to give up the money.

I don't get it. :confused:
Shadowstorm
02-04-2009, 08:53 AM
Man, that thing looks awesome.

http://www.thedenverchannel.com/2009/0204/18637186_640X480.jpg
Sandman
02-04-2009, 08:54 AM
I don't get it. :confused:

The first store clerk would have been dead.
Ink Asylum
02-04-2009, 08:55 AM
I like that both clerks recognized the weapon.
Bad Buddha
02-04-2009, 08:58 AM
Hey... has anybody seen Fitty lately?
Telefrog
02-04-2009, 09:02 AM
Man, that thing looks awesome.


I never even knew there were so many varieties.
headhunter228
02-04-2009, 09:03 AM
That's just hilarious. It's not funny that the dude's robbing stores, but I would love to have been there to see him pull a bat'leth on some poor gas station clerk.
Talanvor
02-04-2009, 09:04 AM
LOL That is fucking funny. Also, the second clerk just saying "Nah...". I'm guessing he thought it was just a prop, and wasn't sharp, which probably isn't that far off.

I do know people, btw, that sharpen crappy prop knives/swords. I'm not sure WHY they do it, but there you are.
Squidbot
02-04-2009, 09:08 AM
I have a couple of swords, a long sword and a short sword, possibly not the technical terms but I learned about weapons from Gary Gygax, so whatever. ANYWAY...After a works piss up one evening a friend from work came to crash at my place. He immediately clocked the swords and asked if I had wetted them. I confessed I had no clue what he was talking about, so he proceeded to take the short sword and repeatedly cut on his arm, saying “You have to get them wet or it’s bad luck.”

I didn’t invite him back again.
Mike Kelehan
02-04-2009, 09:09 AM
I love that both clerks recognized the sword by name.
Generation ABXY
02-04-2009, 09:12 AM
I have a couple of swords, a long sword and a short sword, possibly not the technical terms but I learned about weapons from Gary Gygax, so whatever. ANYWAY...After a works piss up one evening a friend from work came to crash at my place. He immediately clocked the swords and asked if I had wetted them. I confessed I had no clue what he was talking about, so he proceeded to take the short sword and repeatedly cut on his arm, saying “You have to get them wet or it’s bad luck.”

I didn’t invite him back again.

Was it a Crysknife? Because there may be something to that...
Squidbot
02-04-2009, 09:13 AM
No, just a short sword, about 20 inches or so.
Generation ABXY
02-04-2009, 09:15 AM
I love that both clerks recognized the sword by name.

Actually, it never implicitly states that they knew the name, just that they recognized it from the show; the story could have just been clarifying what the sword was called.
Bad Buddha
02-04-2009, 09:22 AM
Was it a Crysknife? Because there may be something to that...
I believe that's a myth about the Nepalese Ghurkas and their khukuri knives.
Generation ABXY
02-04-2009, 09:37 AM
I believe that's a myth about the Nepalese Ghurkas and their khukuri knives.

I was just trying to make an equally nerdy (to the OP) reference to Frank Herbert’s Dune. :o
Ancalagon
02-04-2009, 09:40 AM
Was it a Crysknife? Because there may be something to that...

If you can get hold of a Sandworm's tooth let me know. I want me some spice.
Bad Buddha
02-04-2009, 09:41 AM
I was just trying to make an equally nerdy (to the OP) reference to Frank Herbert’s Dune. :o
Oops! I guess I'm not nerdy enough to catch the reference.

Whew! :D
Ancalagon
02-04-2009, 09:43 AM
Oops! I guess I'm not nerdy enough to catch the reference.

Whew! :D

You are hereby banned from CoG until you have read Dune.
Bad Buddha
02-04-2009, 09:47 AM
You are hereby banned from CoG until you have read Dune.
I read it in 1971. You can't blame me for not remembering details. :p
Generation ABXY
02-04-2009, 09:47 AM
Oops! I guess I'm not nerdy enough to catch the reference.

Whew! :D

If you can get hold of a Sandworm's tooth let me know. I want me some spice.

Whew, indeed.


You are hereby banned from CoG until you have read Dune.

Seconded.
DoctorFinger
02-04-2009, 09:47 AM
I love how Telefrog automatically added the apostrophe to the name of the sword!
zarathstra
02-04-2009, 10:55 AM
If you can get hold of a Sandworm's tooth let me know. I want me some spice.

Seriously dude, that stuff is tight. Ladies love a blue eyeballed man who lives for centuries.
Telefrog
02-04-2009, 10:57 AM
I love how Telefrog automatically added the apostrophe to the name of the sword!

It shames me that I knew the correct spelling without looking it up.
Urizen
02-04-2009, 12:02 PM
Hey... has anybody seen Fitty lately?

HA!

Well played, sir.
Narradisall
02-04-2009, 12:16 PM
I tried this once, but no one was scared of a Sonic screwdriver.

Damn unscary British sci-fi weaponry.
Froghourt
02-04-2009, 03:28 PM
Seriously dude, that stuff is tight. Ladies love a blue eyeballed man who lives for centuries.

I wonder what spice tastes like? I do remember Paul thinking about it, but I believe that the spice was a high concentration mixed in with some other food.
zarathstra
02-04-2009, 04:02 PM
I wonder what spice tastes like? I do remember Paul thinking about it, but I believe that the spice was a high concentration mixed in with some other food.

I thought they said it tasted vaguely of cinnamon at some point, but its been a long time.
Generation ABXY
02-04-2009, 04:29 PM
I thought they said it tasted vaguely of cinnamon at some point, but its been a long time.

Indeed, in smell and in taste. Though it is also added that it is "never twice the same." :confused:
Froghourt
02-04-2009, 04:36 PM
So, what? The first time it tastes like cinnamon, the next like salmon? I mean there are only that many tastes you can go through, and the freman apparently use it in everything.
Inspector Fowler
02-04-2009, 10:08 PM
Who here is shocked that the night shift clerk at 7-11 is a nerd?


Not I.
KamaItachi
02-04-2009, 10:13 PM
The clerk did not give him any money and the suspect left the store on foot.

How the hell else are you going to leave a store? Did they expect him to teleport or something?
BLeeP
02-04-2009, 10:23 PM
How the hell else are you going to leave a store? Did they expect him to teleport or something?

I believe the correct term is beam.
KamaItachi
02-04-2009, 10:29 PM
I believe the correct term is beam.

ugh, you're right.

I believe there's a card I should be handing in right about now.
Wasson_
02-04-2009, 10:38 PM
5cB5voc5-6Y

Good tea...Nice house.

LUL
LongStepMantis
02-04-2009, 11:03 PM
5cB5voc5-6Y

Good tea...Nice house.

LUL

1:33-1:44, that shit is hilarious.
Squidbot
02-05-2009, 04:30 AM
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v230/linvuiet/dragoncontv_com.jpg
Ghost Rider
02-05-2009, 11:03 AM
How the hell else are you going to leave a store? Did they expect him to teleport or something?

That must be the first time I have actually laughed properly at something I read on CoG!

It would of been better if he had cursed in Klingon when they refused though.
GigaFuzz
02-05-2009, 12:00 PM
I don't know if anyone else checked out the picture in the article, but the Bat'leth he's using is half the size of a 'real' one, if that. Fail.